Monday, August 10, 2015

Super Advanced Psionics and Lizardpeople LARP

Progress continues!

Though not fast enough. Never fast enough, really. Quite frankly this continued debacle with Retekra Industries has had me incredibly stressed. So much so that I've decided I need a new hobby. Role-playing in Guild Wars 2 has been fun, so I thought I would try something new and take part in a classic honest-to-goodness Dungeons and Dragons tabletop campaign.

I have since learned that real world military campaigns are only slightly more complex to plan.

So, I have been undertaking research to make this campaign in which I will play- as a yet to be named brown-eyed second generation Half Elf Wizard/Binder with aspirations towards Effigy Mastery and a Thrush familiar named Limbaugh (who only shuts up with command and is prone to advising people against their own best interests)- a truly valiant effort.

In my studies I have learned some fascinating things. For instance, do you know what the longest running Dungeons and Dragons Campaign is?

The Ramtha School of Enlightenment Campaign- and what a campaign it is!

It began in 1977 when Judith Darlene Hampton (now known as Judy Zebra Knight- or more commonly J.Z. Knight- because I think even they know that's just far too silly.) rolled up her character: Ramtha, an ancient Lemurian Warrior.

Pictured here. (Fun fact, Lemurians were cut from inclusion in a Star Wars movie.)
So talented were they at role-playing Ramtha the Lemurian Warrior that a great many people signed up to take part in this game despite an absolutely egregious buy-in cost- which is to say the entirety of their life savings and any assets such as businesses they may own.

Buying into the campaign allows you to live in a commune near Mount Rainier and work for Ramtha in order to level up and eventually gain any number of promised powers such as :

  • Novice : The Ability to Make Water Crystals Prettier By Saying Nice Things to Them.
  • Adept   : The Ability to Travel Backwards In Time
  • Master  : The Ability to SHAPE REALITY With Your Mind!

Here we have an example of Judy Zebra Knight Role-Playing Ramtha the Lemurian.

These powers are important and will be sorely tested once the combat segment of the campaign starts.

You see, the campaign is being held primarily at the Ramtha School for Enlightenment near Mount Rainier, Washington, United States because there is a race of evil lizard people who are trapped under the Mountain and one day soon, any day now, they will burst forth and slay everyone who doesn't have an excess of copper lying around, because as everyone knows evil subterranean lizard people cannot abide copper.

They might also attack from space. Judy Zebra Knight likes to keep their players on their toes.

Presumably on this day the followers of Ramtha will venture forth to do battle with these vile creatures using their amazing minds. Which, to be fair, really is the only way to slay imaginary creatures.

As far as I can tell the only class, prestige or otherwise, cultists of Ramtha can aspire to is to be a 'Remarkable Life'. Something like a Psionic Favored Soul I'm thinking.

Come for the Spiritual Boot Camp, stay because now you're broke and they locked the front gate.
The game has been so successful that it has even drawn superstar players such as Salma Hayek, who apparently elected not to become a Remarkable Life or otherwise could not stay in character. They apparently believe in God and Jesus, which is very much against the Ramthan doctrine that stresses you yourself are God. Though, naturally, some people are more God than others- specifically Judy Zebra Knight who's character Ramtha's name means 'God' in ancient Lemurian.

That's why they get to reap in millions in annual revenue.

Judy Zebra Knight has been mocked and criticized, according to wikipedia, by no less than Carl Sagan himself who expressed doubt that Judy Zebra Knight is in fact channeling a Lemurian General who led an army of 3.5 million against the natives of Atlantis during the Pleistocene Ice Age.

This of course has not rattled people who believe they can see mystical energy.
"This school, these teachings and this truth has saved my life many, many times," said Stephany Ray, 56, of Yelm. "The school has taught me to love myself, has taught me and helped me to find the God within me. ... I always knew there was more to life, but I didn't know what or how."
Ray was living in Philadelphia and was a vice-president and certified financial planner for Prudential Bache Securities when she first attended a New York "Ramtha Dialogue" in 1984.
She spent a few years traveling around the country to attend other Ramtha events before moving to Yelm in 1988.
Ray said she doesn't see a woman when Knight channels Ramtha. She sees an entirely different "energy."
"It's a male energy, it's a loving energy, it's a powerful energy, and it's a truthful energy," Ray said.
Unfortunately it has gone a bit too far at at times, when now-named Judy Zebra Knight used her character of Ramtha to convince one Jeff Knight that he was her one true love and thus to marry her... ...and then that he should forgo any treatment for HIV because Ramtha would cure him of it.

Thirty-plus minutes of sheer depression. Far too late, Mr. Knight came to his senses and sued- but died of AIDS before he could appeal- the courts ruled against him. Not for the first time the courts have been favorable to the quite-wealthy Zebra.

Judy Zebra Knight however has kept the last name because, it would seem, all things considered that's all she really wanted from him in the first place. Would have been far more ethical just to change their name really.

Here's the 20/20 episode referenced in that interview by the way, if interested.

More recently, or rather in 2012 at least, Judy Zebra Knight got into a great deal of hot water after being caught in a video ranting about jews, mexicans and so on virulently.

The most troubling common thread about all of those links however is that while they reference the slur-laden ranting video- the video itself has been purged from every link. Purging unfavorable things from the internet is hard to do. I'm quite alarmed they, even with their millions, managed to do it.

Why, in my casual searching I was only able to find a few fragments of it.

The closest thing to an intact video is found HERE
From the Examiner Article, which in turn is from, Judy Zebra Knight and Granddaughter with President Obama. I most fervently hope this has no link to their success in purging the internet, but either way I have just lost a great deal of respect for President Obama- who accepted a fair chunk of money from them.

Something is usually wrong when the Republicans are THIS RIGHT.

Also, HERE is a blog post summing up more absurdity and ignominy- including mention of a case where a court in Vienna ruled that JZ Knight was in fact channeling the one true imaginary Lemurian.

In closing, anyone who could actually reshape reality with their mind WOULD NOT NEED PLASTIC SURGERY. Least of all THAT MUCH of it.
I meant for this one to be funny, but quite frankly I'm a bit creeped out now. Excuse me, I'm going to go raise the security level a bit...

Progress continues.


  1. Well, when Mt. Rainer erupts, let's hope they did actually plan for a lizard invasion, instead of making sure they were safely outside of a lahar zone. :D

    1. Unfortunately, it would be among the more merciful ends for many Ramtha has 'cured' of things like cancer, which the people then mysteriously died of. If science could only predict when exactly the eruption would happen... perhaps we could arrange a Faith Healer convention there. I'll run it by some of our people- but fully expect to be shot down by the ethics officers.