Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Jex Blackmore and the Goblet of the Liar

Progress continues!

Actually as a whole there have been few if any positive developments. Retekra Industries continues to exist and there is no clear angle of attack on them, yet. Comically however, though they've been peddling the stolen technology around looking for investment no variation of Freeze-Your-Head-Until-Death-Is-Cured Inc. is taking them seriously.

The Raelians, however, are ecstatic and hammering on their door despite claiming to have produced a great many human clones already. If you have no idea who I'm talking about, it will be my pleasure to get to that in the next update.

No, today I wanted to focus on something nice and light-hearted- like the unveiling of the monument to baphomet unveiled by the Satanic Temple, Detroit Chapter.

Baphomet the Happy Goat, friend to Dick and Sally! So edgy. So edgy. Times Article : HERE
If you should happen to read that article you might notice the spokesperson is one Jex Blackmore. Would it surprise you to learn after that THAT IS NOT HER REAL NAME?!

Take that Mrs. Miggins! Who's in timeout NOW?!

It's really very funny. She's a few shades away from insisting her name is Hex Blackmores. They chose that name for 'security reasons' of course. Not at all because it goes so well with the tattoos.

I assume Lady Blackwood was too derivative and on-the-nose.
Anyhow, their mission statement is that they do not worship Satan- Satan's just a symbol representing rebelling against arbitary authority. They actually stand for rationality, justice, empathy and all the good things. Which is why they chose the Father of Lies as their mascot, you can trust them!

It's totally not just edgy petty rebellion against the SHEEPLE.

Actually, let's take a closer look at what they claim to believe.

"The Satanic Temple practices non-theistic Satanism, we believe that religion can, and should, be divorced from superstition. As such, we do not believe in either God or the Devil as supernatural forces. We bow to no god or gods and celebrate our outsider status. To embrace the name Satan is to embrace rational inquiry removed from supernaturalism and archaic tradition-based superstitions. The Satanist should actively work to hone critical thinking and exercise reasonable inquiry in all things. Our beliefs must be malleable to the best current scientific understandings of the material world — never the reverse." - About Us

Well, aside of embracing Satan it would seem all Scientists are in fact devout Satanists- which curiously enough cycles back around to promoting what knee-jerky dark-age Churches were saying while they screeched for Galileo to be pilloried. Wrong from the opposite direction! Brilliant.

Curiously they seem to be under the impression that their religion is science, but science really is a poor religion. A great pursuit- among the most noble of endeavors- but not a great religion. Religion is about faith. Science is about knowledge.

Maybe these guys are on the level though! Let's take a look at these Scientists in action.

You know, I can't recall ever seeing a lab or church that featured a... mosh pit, is it? It would be VERY hard to get anything done.
Really it looks like they're having fun but it's equally clear this is little more than the Detroit Chapter of the Temple of Fuck You Dan You're Not Even My Real Dad.

Curiously, their revelries- however designed to piss off Christians- do little more than speak well of modern-day Christians. I mean, those comments above are rather short on vows of vengeance on behalf of an Omniscient, Omnipowerful Deity- which is apt, if they actually piss off such an entity no mortal agency need act on their behalf and no agency at all could stop them.

Can you picture this happening in Iran, though? Saudi Arabia? Anywhere in an Islamic nation?

The grand unveiling, short on mosh but BIG on pit.
Meanwhile the satanic monument isn't half as horrifying as one person attending the unveiling. (Not work safe, Satanists are big on transparent tops apparently)

If you click that link you may wonder who that is. Just the one gives me chills, the rest are just neutral, funny and/or sad. Make a game of it if you like! I'll give you some time to guess.

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Yes, you guessed it, it's...


It's like the Joker gassed her.
Of all the people photographed there, this is the one I think is most likely to poison my coffee.

You can tell they have determined their 'good side' and 'good angle' but it doesn't really help when the hollowness of their life radiates out of their eyes. Lady, put away the makeup, get the hell out of there and find value in yourself divorced from aesthetics- it's either already there or can be cultivated in short order.
Those are two different pictures by the way. I had to look at them twice to be sure myself.


If that insincere grin was any wider, her jaw would be in danger of falling off. It appears set to unhinge at any moment.

Terrifying.

Anyhow, moving on- I learned many things looking over those photos including what I believe a Satanic Poetry session must look like.

"Black. Like my Soul. Like the Pain of being told Daddy would not replace my totaled Beemer. Fuck you Christian Daddy." *audience fingersnaps*
Wait, do you see them? I have Spotted Satan! In this very picture!

And the angels wept, for it sounded like ass. Like Powdered Toast Man flying home after sitting on a traffic cone.
*low whistling sound*
He's white, male and old with nothing approaching fashion sense and is quite possibly the only person there not drawing on their parent's money. Check and Mate, Nemesis of the Soul.

Is it too late for them to re-do the monument?

Unrelated to anything, but excellent.
Progress continues!


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